Sometimes I type, and retype, and retype. Something on my heart is bursting to be said, and I want it to be said perfectly. And because I try to say things perfectly, it often just doesn’t get said. So I needed to sit and write this and just let my heart open.
About a month ago, God put a phrase in my head, and it has been on major repeat all day every day since.
Revelation over Reassurance
And seriously, as soon as he whispered those words to me, my heart LEPT inside of me. I didn’t have the wisdom to discern what exactly it meant at the time, but I knew without a doubt it was a word for me. And to be honest, the first thing I did was whip out my phone because I was like- oh yeah, that’s status worthy. So I started to write out these meaningless words that I thought it meant, but then God whispered to me again.
No- these words are for the secret. Keep them in the secret.
I put my phone up and tucked the words in my heart, and man- they have haunted me and kept me up and given me comfort and made me think and sometimes even cry and marvel at what he was revealing to me, tenderly.
I’m so much quicker to seek reassurance from the world than I am to seek revelation from the Lord. I’m so much quicker to go to a friend, or facebook, or instagram for approval and advice than I am to go to the Lord. And worldly reassurance majorly hinders heavenly revelation. When the Lord reveals something to me, it is always striking. And even if it’s discipline or correction, it’s so much sweeter than the most encouraging words from the world. The voice of the world has told me that my selfishness and pride and vanity and greed and chase for perfection were completely necessary in order to be successful. It was reassuring me that my sins were okay. The world told me my pride was just dignity and self-respect. It told me my vanity was just confidence and that my greed was well deserved because of the hardships I faced when I was younger.
But when the Lord asked me to seek a revelation instead of that reassurance, I found that the world had lied and made my heart sins easy and acceptable. He revealed so many sins that had grown roots in my heart and become permanent. But he also whispered something else to me, something so sweet that I had almost forgotten.
I will be merciful to their iniquities and remember their sins no more.
Hebrews 8:12
That verse was like sparkling water crashing over the broken mess inside me and cleansing my guilt and shame and it was a word of life. I struggle with accepting that the Lord has forgiven every awful thing I’ve done. I have to say this verse to myself when I can’t escape guilt. I have to remind myself that the Lord won’t withhold goodness or love from me because of anything I’ve done. He is just the epitome of good, despite anything we’ve done or thought or felt or acted on.
Christ is the one who reveals the the identity of the Father. He helps us feed our spirit nature and starve our flesh nature. And it is so hard- I haven’t learned yet how not to be tempted by the world. But the Lord deeply wants each and every one of his children to seek spiritual revelation and holiness through prayer and scripture- because what is the purpose of a revelation? I believe, ultimately, it is to be shared. A shared revelation is a prophetic word, which brings encouragement, strength, and comfort to others.
“…but you should also desire the special abilities the Spirit gives- especially the ability to prophecy… one who prophecies strengthens others, encourages them, and comforts them.” I Corinthians 14:1-3 paraphrased
Did you get that? The creator Elohim wants to speak life into you, and wants you to speak life into others. And like, I’m just so ready to speak life. I’m so tired of wallowing in my own pity and heartbreak and bitterness. I’m worn out from letting depression and weariness and pretending to be okay rule my secret place. I want my secret place to come to life and glorify God.
Maybe this post was just for me and you won’t get anything out of it, but I’m ready to replace the world’s reassurance with Spirit revelation.
Photo by Katie Faith
